Church conflict is almost always referred to as a problem. Or even a curse.

While some church conflict is destructive, at Living Stones Associates we believe that some kinds of conflict are actually essential to church health and should be cultivated. The myth that "all conflict is bad" leads to conflict avoidance–sweeping both healthy and unhealthy conflict under the rug and treating as troublemakers those who are stimulating life-giving conflict.

Could it be that the greater threat to the health of your church is not conflict–but conflict avoidance?

Find out if your church is being crippled by conflict avoidance.

1. Read the article.

Why Your Church Needs Conflict

by Eddy Hall Senior consultant Living Stones Associates

Do you enjoy conflict? I can't say that I do. When disagreement surfaces, especially in the church, my instinctive response is usually "uh-oh."

"Relational conflict is what the Bible calls sin," reads a discipling manual I came across recently. That says it pretty straight, doesn't it? But there's a basic problem with this take on things: It's not true. While, of course, sin does breed some conflicts, others grow out of nothing more sinister than differences in experience or personality or even spiritual gifts.

Not all conflict is bad. Much tension is life-giving--inviting us to grow, learn, or develop intimacy... more

2. Change your focus.

Don't Focus on the Conflict--Focus on the Vision

When destructive conflict arises in the church, our instinct is to focus on the most conflicted people in the congregation. While we believe that people need to be heard and respected, and we believe in appropriate church discipline, our basic approach in dealing with church conflict does not consist of focusing on the conflict.

Rather, we ask, "Does your church have a deeply shared vision of what God is calling you to become?" In deeply conflicted churches, the answer is almost always no. We believe the most fruitful path to healthy unity is to come together around a deeply shared understanding of God's purposes for the church's future. The shared vision, the shared mission, is what unites us.

3. Get a "church health checkup."

How healthy is your church? How would you find out? At Living Stones Associates, we have selected the Natural Church Development survey as the tool we use to measure church health. Based on the largest global study of church growth ever conducted, this tool measures a congregation's relative health in eight areas--called "quality characteristics." By identifying your church's strengths and your weaknesses, you can explore how to use your strengths to address your weaknesses.

This survey is repeated as an annual health checkup to monitor your progress in addressing your Minimum Factor and to identify your new Minimum Factor each years so you will know where to focus your energy for the coming year.

The more we have used this tool in our work with churches, the more valuable we have found it to be. To learn more about the Natural Church Development process, the best place to begin is by reading the book by Christian Schwarz. While any church can order and take the NCD survey on its own, the survey is of greatest value when a trained NCD consultant guides the church in interpreting the results and developing and implementing an action plan designed to strengthen the Minimum Factor. Five members of the Living Stones consulting team are certified Natural Church Development consultants.

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5. Enlist an outside coach.

When you get sick, you go to a doctor. When a church is sick, wouldn't it be nice to be able to take your church to the doctor for a checkup, a diagnosis, and a prescription? Well, it is, but typically the "doctor" comes to you. What you're looking for is a church consultant who specializes in church health. A good church health consultant can help you understand what is not working and why, and can guide your leaders in developing and implementing an action plan to restore greater spiritual health and missional effectiveness.

A church health consultant cannot, though, do the work for you. The hard work of removing the barriers to church health must be done by the leaders within your church.

If you're thinking an outside coach could help your church become healthier, you may want to check out our Church Health Consultation.

6. Let us introduce ourselves.

Living Stones Associates is a team of church consultants who work with leadership teams in local churches to equip them to better equip the body of Christ for ministry. We do this through consultations, equipping events, and short- and long-term ministry coaching.

Our founder is Ray Bowman, a church architect-turned-consultant who in the 1980s pioneered ways to help churches save hundreds of thousands or even millions on construction so they could redirect those resources to ministry.

Building on this foundation, we work with churches that are committed to becoming healthier and more effective in carrying out their mission. For congregations whose needs include facility planning, we offer the Integrated Planning Consultation.

To meet our consultants, check them out here.